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Steve Werner: Welcome back to grow your impact income and influence, my name is Steve Warner and I have a an amazing show for you today normally this show is all about marketing.

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Steve Werner: Growing your impact growing your income, today we are talking to the number one.

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Steve Werner: Female real estate entrepreneur she is in currently remodeling an entire town, most people do a house, I asked her how many doors she had she said well my current project is we’re doing an entire town don welcome to the show how are you today.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I stayed bang on the show today i’m really excited.

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Steve Werner: dawn has been.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: A ball of fire on sorry.

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Steve Werner: one.

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Steve Werner: I need to get the name correct.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Every it happens, a lot it happens, a lot that I want everybody know that i’m drawn so that wonderful makes sense.

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Steve Werner: Tell us what that is.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Wonderful is this.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: An entire new brand and concept that I built around my crazy pink hair my crazy pink flamingos and my podcast wonderful real estate podcast ever and it’s just a fun great educational place to be a part of.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I want my family I love everybody, I decided that if i’m ever gonna have fun and go crazy if that’d be now.

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Steve Werner: That is awesome I love it if you guys can’t see her if you’re listening to this and not looking at the video she has pink flamingos behind her she’s got bright pink hair she is super fun and exciting, but it did not.

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Steve Werner: start here for you it’s hearted when you turn 30 you had an unplanned divorce you’re left with a child you’ve done a bunch of drugs bunch of drinking in your 20s how did you become a real estate investor How does that lead to being a real estate investor.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: yeah I had a esteem and even though I tell the story a lot every time I say i’m just like I just I don’t even know.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: How I got here, you know because I was crazy, so I want to use it was the 80s and I worked at a lot of my claws I actually got fired from dennings so yeah part of my fun story denny’s fired me on third shift so pretty bad, I think.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And I get married i’m 30 I have a baby she’s a month old.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: dad I have an unexpected split up and he was kind of a jerk and he took like the car and the money and he left and so now, I was like okay baby.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: i’m the job skills have been fired from all my jobs in my 20s I did a lot of drugs, the stupid stuff and now I have to be a grown up today.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: So I basically kind of just like getting reflected on my 20s and realize I got fired from almost all of my jobs.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And everyone said the same thing you’re insubordinate you, you talk to my eyes, you tell people how they can run their companies better you tell owners of companies, all the things are going wrong, what they could do better.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: So I had it in me I think already to work for myself, I thought you know, but just work on myself, nobody can fire me.

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Steve Werner: To answer.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I have a baby and if I fail working for myself, I can go get a job, but I knew like I do like deep down, I knew if I got a job I probably say in until she was 18 and then i’d wake up one day and be 50 and so working for somebody else and.

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Steve Werner: yeah.

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I think.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: So I thought, well, I don’t I don’t want to like work for the man I don’t want that life for myself, but I was really terrified to take a step i’m a because I really was fired from like 10 jobs, like a lot.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: and never having a good one, I was always there always on time, even with you on time good good good, but I just was real opinionated and I shared it with.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: lots of people.

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Steve Werner: I mean, I think all the entrepreneurs listening to this show I think we’ve all had that experience, where we’re like we show up for the job, where the best employee we’re telling them how to fix it and we end up getting fired because, like to hear that stuff.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: yeah they down every you know it’s funny every time I had within just a short time I was always moved to like the top what a manager director, but then I would like to start talking less and listen.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And here’s where you’re going wrong and here’s what’s happening and they’d be like seriously.

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Steve Werner: yep.

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Steve Werner: Do you buy my start in entrepreneurship was getting fired for just that, like nope you’re not like you can’t tell me what to do, that’s why they pay me the money I don’t care that your ideas better.

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Steve Werner: And you’re fired okay well i’m going to go start my own business and do great with it, I think any.

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Steve Werner: it’s funny because you talk about like you were fearful right, you were scared like how do I start this I don’t know if this is going to work, but when you get fired enough times and then you have something that pushes you over the edge.

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Steve Werner: yeah you take action so you took action did how’d you buy your first property.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And you know and just I want to preface also I waited until I was older to I mean I know kids now like now, and the 2020s they’ll have their kids later, but.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: yeah i’m 62 it’s like back in the 70s and the 80s, people were like getting a school and having kids are young, so I was really considered, like everybody I knew had kids I was like the last lone ranger there, so my mind was girl scout mom homeroom mom field trip mom cooking mom.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I ended up my husband took off, I was like okay well, if I have to work I can’t do those things, then she has to go to daycare and I waited till I was 30 which at that time was fairly old.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Because like literally every person I knew had children.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And so I was like oh my gosh well I don’t know, I have to find something so really and I always like to tell you, and I do like to tell people my age, because 30 years ago you didn’t find jobs on the Internet.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: People don’t have cell phones we didn’t have pagers yeah, what do you have pagers so all the jobs from the classified section of the newspaper, do you have to look in the paper yes call you have to make me like it’s a whole thing it’s really time consuming and I kept going.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: To these you know by a bunch of people showing up for interviews and there was so much multi level marketing.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I thought God I just need a job or something I had to find something so I met some people that were actually real estate investors and they said hey you should try this we buy a house a little bit fix them up and we sell them, so I thought.

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Steve Werner: This is a novel idea back then.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: It was very novel and because I was so naive what they said was we buy houses, we fix them up and sell them, but what I heard is I could decorate houses and make a living decorating houses and I love to decorate and have excellent taste so that’s the job for me, I will be a decorator.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And it was not the same thing we having a decorating are not the same thing.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Oh.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: My God, no, no, my first deal I knocked on doors.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I met a woman and she was going through a similar situation was like you know I, and I was honest I said listen, I never done this before, but I feel like I can help you so you move out or move in.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: fix it and decorated.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And we’ll split in the share of the profit and then afterwards all decorated custom blinds like all the stuff you did in the in the 80s and the 90s.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: It means so much work Steve so much work and I was like oh my God I don’t even know what to do now, I have no idea what to do this is all I know, so I went to home depot and took classes.

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Steve Werner: I love it.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Every like every class they had and learns how to lay tile I used to build screens I put kitchen kitchen cabinets together at night I learned how to hang ceiling fans partial wash paint roofs.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Electric plumbing all of it, I learned all of it.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: So how so how long did it take.

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Steve Werner: To do that first house.

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i’m.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Not as long as you would think like the paint and carpet like Bam Bam are you ready to go about six months it was like six months, but I was living in and.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I were living in it she’s with me and i’m like Okay, this is fun she’s with me every day she’s toggling i’m letting her draw on the walls and you know all the fun things is yeah i’m going to fix it.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: But I take those classes and I just really worth like every minute she’d be sleeping i’d be working because I needed the money, and I was living on credit cards, and I was getting more and more buried in debt by the nano minutes, so it took about maybe six months.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: On the first one, and then sassy I didn’t know how to sell houses i’m not a real estate agent, I still don’t have a license so I call these fields like hey I need to sell us so.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: What do I do now and then later he likes showed me what a get a sales content like Neil sign here and here and here here.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And I had a person that walked in the door on the fourth day 100% fha qualified all the money all the everything you needed and I thought wow these are so easy to sell look at that sold in four days.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: which, as we know, is not normal how it works, but my first one, and it closed really quickly, I mean 20,000 bucks sounds like.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: so much money.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: yeah was led by this time it’s like 1991 88 and I was like I have $20,000 in the bank i’m rich that’s it whoo i’m gonna do it again.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And I moved to another one move did another one, and then by the third one, I moved again and that was about when she was starting kindergarten.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: yeah I had made quite a bit of money at that point, so I was able to hire some crews and do a couple houses that once.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I started off as a full rehab or with no knowledge I tell people listen, do you want to be a rehabber i’m happy to teach you everything I now just don’t go buy a house and think again decorated because that’s not how it works I.

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Steve Werner: mean the fact that you win awesome that you went and you learned how to do tile cabinets carpet, like all of the things.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I came to me because I was always at home depot buying pains and.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: faucets and little things like that, and the guys like you should take some of these classes, what do you mean so they start telling me about these classes, they had.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: So when the House had the basic things I was like oh God, I need to do it needs floors is so much work, so the the first class I taught.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: anything about it, I was out of my mind, the first class I took was had to lay tile and I did the entire kitchen i’m thinking, why would I start looking back, why would I not start with like a bathroom or like a closet I just did the whole kitchen.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And it looked beautiful.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I mean.

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Steve Werner: I don’t get the feeling that you do anything small so.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I was out of my mind back then I just.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: didn’t know it yeah.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: kitchen and I thought wow This is like, as if it’s going it’s a really big space skip that one is more and more, and then I did the bathroom Okay, I should have said smaller maybe that turned out great and like beautiful I sort of OCD about everything being perfect.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: yeah it looks really good.

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Steve Werner: So okay you do some rehabs you’re getting going you’re Now you can hire the crew, I think, nowadays, I mean I don’t I did real estate in college, I did very similar about a condemned House I lived in part of it and fix it up.

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Steve Werner: really well with it, I bought an apartment building and then things took off and then I sold every.

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Steve Werner: But the, I think, nowadays, people are like, how can I i’m just going to hire crews to do stuff you knew how to hire crews, because you knew how to do this stuff and you knew how to check their work.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I did, and the other thing is you got to think back 30 years ago there were no Ria groups, yet in South Florida know Ria groups, no Internet.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And there’s no women really in the business so in the first real group I saw an ad and classify like hey they’re going to start a real group of real estate investors come to this hotel room in boca raton Florida i’m going to go.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Like 80 people there and there’s me and one of the woman is all men so i’m like what are you doing my all of my rehab and they’re like.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: where’s your husband i’m thinking no i’m a rehabber I fix the houses up so hard time sort of breaking into the boys club.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: For say we’re like oh seriously like you Yuri and like because that, back then, I still have like the big blond farmed out kind of 80s hair.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: yeah and i’ve got girls and then you know figure thing and they’re just like you, are like I afraid to break a nail, but no i’ve done like five houses, like all the work.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: All of it.

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Steve Werner: That probably got their attention pretty quick because that’s not saying you would hear a lot.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: No, no, I was even written up in the paper wants this Ria groups started the fort lauderdale the sun Sentinel.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: So hey we’re here you’re rehabbing houses and they took my picture and put me in the paper, this is woman she’s single she’s rehabbing houses and I was like oh my gosh I mean the paper.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: So things are.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: crazy.

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Steve Werner: So the question I want to ask you now, then, is like how has how things changed from this is early 90s, we have cell phones, now we have the Internet now we have Ria groups now we have stuff all over the place.

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Steve Werner: How has.

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Steve Werner: I would love your personal take on how things have changed from then till now like, what do you need to be successful, now if somebody starting right now, what do they need to be successful.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: yeah I think they still need the same things that I had back then and and, for me, you know I find that when people get put into a corner and they have like the fight or flight.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: attitude and so clearly I was all about fighting and you know, making it happen and raising my daughter, instead of like oh my God, you know what if I fail quit.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: So I think you have to be willing to have like a little fighter flight, you know hey yeah i’m gonna fight and make this happen for myself, I didn’t even really just tend to have a lot of gumption.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And not worry about failing because, even if you fail you learn so every failure is still a success yeah now and.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: With everything be able to have now I always say like listen, you have the Internet, you have a courthouse online, I had a by the stupid map folks and figure out how to navigate my way through neighborhoods I mean.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I would get stuck in a neighborhood not be able to figure out how to get out.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: You have GPS for the love of God, how can you not make this happen so when people so relic town there’s Houston I didn’t want to hear it.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I had none of those things, so you have everything in front of you, but, but the other side of the coin is there’s so many people on the Internet, saying that they’re experts.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And as you and I both know sometimes people do one deal and write an entire program and claim all this success that they don’t actually have.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: So it’s easy to fall under the guidance, I guess, if someone who really does not have the real experience to help you become successful so for new people.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: know our I feel like sometimes technology is a little bit of a hindrance, because everyone looks amazing like they’re professionals, that they have a great website.

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Steve Werner: Well it’s a it comes it I think technology is a crutch as well, like people like lean on it and they make excuses around it well i’m gonna go look for houses today or i’m gonna go do prospecting well I went through craigslist and nobody was there, you need to go knock on doors.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: doors, I still to this very day, why still work with students and my husband.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: my daughter, and I like netsuite we’re up in our little town we’re going to go knock on that there’s only 25 foreclosures way to knock on their doors.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And even in this day and age, with all the things that are out there, people still really love it when you come to their house and offer to help them.

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Steve Werner: Well that’s you know what yellow letters are right, so I did, yes, I did a yellow letter campaign probably 2014 2015.

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Steve Werner: What I did was I I took the addresses that I could drive to and just went knocked on their door.

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Steve Werner: To follow up to the letters.

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Steve Werner: That led to deals.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: yeah it does.

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Steve Werner: it’s it is.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And people are afraid.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Are you afraid the hammers and yell at you.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Or what are you afraid of.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And then say, well, I don’t know.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: program here to scratch.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: say this and knock on doors like get out of your bond fan, I still know people are you doing on king and no nobody does that, but the most successful students, I have.

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Do it.

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Steve Werner: Because they get results that.

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Steve Werner: This all boils down to hard work.

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Steve Werner: that’s what nobody wants to hear it’s i’ve been hard work going and knocking on somebody’s door.

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Steve Werner: it’s getting over that fear hump which you, I mean you put it very well, like you, you had to.

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Steve Werner: You weren’t thinking about I might fail, you were thinking about I need to put food on the table, I need to find saying that works for me that allows me to be with my daughter raise her and it’s I mean.

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Steve Werner: it’s fine doing rehab work is.

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Steve Werner: kind of fun at least when you’re starting.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Well, and let me tell you something real quick I tell everyone, as I said, less than you ever find yourself by done nasty towards.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: rehab a house, because, as your ribbon the cabinets off and i’m not one set of cabinets is like a sledgehammer and it was like splinters I decimated this kitchen when I was done, I was like.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: gosh I feel I feel good get all that out of my system and I made $20,000.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: On a therapy rehab a house and destroy it you’ll feel great.

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Steve Werner: So tell me where if somebody wants to get started, because I think a lot of people, I mean my gateway drug was rich dad poor dad.

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Steve Werner: I read it on a plane trip coming back from Italy, a guy sitting next to me on the plane gave it to me, I read it, I got back I got fired from my job, and I was like.

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Steve Werner: i’m going to go I started a commercial cleaning business and I started a real I I started going and knocking on doors.

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Steve Werner: The.

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Steve Werner: But what I want to hear from you is where should people start nowadays because everyone’s read rich dad poor dad now and they’re like yeah I want to invest in real estate, but I don’t know.

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Steve Werner: What like I don’t want to be a landlord or I don’t know where to start or the markets are all so hot right now, what do you say when somebody says that.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: yeah I know I you know I tell what really changed my financial for me is going to this Ria group that open I learned about wholesaling.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I was, like all the phone I can get a house on a contract which i’m really good at.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: So i’m not shy to talk to people, and I can sell it to a rehab or a landlord and just make money and not actually do that anymore, so my mind was just like holy cow, I meant there was no one to follow, then you know, so my first year of wholesaling I wholesale 75 houses.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Oh boom, but I didn’t know that that was a lot didn’t have anything to compare it to because I didn’t know anybody else wholesaling.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: So i’m gonna go into this real group and they started doing this deal of the month, and so one month I go well, listen I just wholesale I kind of gave my numbers and everyone just got real quiet.

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Steve Werner: There wholesaling like three.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Did you do last year, I said 75 and.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: The highest person in the room did 20.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: yeah all of a sudden they’re like oh my God one’s a Queen and I was like I didn’t even I was like Okay, it was a monster didn’t even know nothing to compare it to so to answer your question.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I remember, making really good money to I actually became a millionaire from wholesaling that’s what like changed my life.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And so I tell people now, the thing that’s nice about it is you don’t have to have real estate license you really truly don’t have to have credit you don’t have to have any money you just find a $10 deposit sign your contract.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And I feel like for today, anyway, I feel like wholesaling and subject tues are a good.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: way for people to generate some quick cash wholesaling and doing some subject tues and offer some owner financing get you some monthly income.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Without being a landlord or rehabbing, especially if you don’t know how I don’t have a lot of money and I weirdly back then, my home depot credit card was my highest credit card.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And a $10,000 home depot cut it alone it in 1988 which is like 50 grand today, which I don’t even know why I had that so high, I just was there um so I I would prefer to see a brand new person start off with something.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Where if a screw it up it’s not financial devastate them to where they can’t try again.

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Steve Werner: Well, they do knocking on doors costs nothing getting something contract is 20 bucks like you and I know this and people here that I think I remember when I was talking to somebody about this that.

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Steve Werner: They were like what well no one’s going to do that and most people won’t you’re going to get 99 knows, maybe to get a yes, but the yes pays you 25 K.

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Steve Werner: Is it worth hearing some nose.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Yes, exactly exactly.

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Steve Werner: Those are.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Like.

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Steve Werner: The nose aren’t they’re not getting a gun in like threatening you they’re just like if you hey, would you be interested in selling your House is that something like are you looking to get out of your house or.

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Steve Werner: Your time we go I get you.

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Steve Werner: If I gave you 10% over market would you sell your House.

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Steve Werner: Okay, no cool thanks man here’s a cup of coffee.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I tell people I said listen you’re you’re the word, you need to learn is next so it says now just okay next.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I mean statistically look at the numbers you’ll not this many doors now not 20 doors you’ll talk to 10 people at some way by leaving a note card whatever you leave.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: and out of those people, you might get a deal or an interest, something and then, if you talk to 20 more people and 20 more doors and you talk to five more people facing you have 20 people that you spoke to and you’re going to get a deal you’re just going to get a deal.

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Steve Werner: Well let’s I just I want to, I want to look at this, the word next is, in my opinion in the top three most powerful words in the entire language dictionary because it appeals to everything in life, it applies to everything in life, your marriage goes South next.

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Steve Werner: Your job go South next deal go South like if you let that stop you from moving forward, you will never.

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Steve Werner: ever be successful in life if you’re having a hard time in a job I.

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Steve Werner: Was dating a girl, a year ago, and she hates her job she get up in the morning and cry i’m an entrepreneur, and you know what my answer was well freakin quit.

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Steve Werner: Like and she’s like I can’t can’t do that because what if what if I don’t get a good job, but if they don’t pay me enough there’s no one hiring I was at one everyone’s hiring to you’re getting contacted by headhunters.

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Steve Werner: agree you’ve got I mean she had money saved I was like so what you don’t work for three months, find a job that you like doing you’re miserable every day we broke up because she wouldn’t she was she couldn’t see the the forest through the trees right but.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I noticed.

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Steve Werner: will solve all.

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Steve Werner: Your problems, yes.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: What is it I box, I do all my life classes, I say everyone say next.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Next is your path to do work next because you do it’s like you said when you’re dating dating is a numbers game your people, and then you marry one minus was my third husband, so I had a next at twice.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: This one now we have 19 year then yo he’s like the guy that I wish I would have met in the beginning, but I had to get through the next next next next next next until.

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Steve Werner: I want to circle back to the thought of failure right.

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Steve Werner: A lot of people have themselves in the middle, if you can see my hands right now on the left hand side is failure on the right hand side of success we’re in the middle.

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Steve Werner: And everyone sees it as well if I go towards failure i’m never going to reach success, and it is the complete opposite, you are here.

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Steve Werner: On the left failures in the middle and successes on the right, you will never get to success without having failures and all.

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Steve Werner: Our our lessons that teach you how to be successful Tyler Perry said this better than anyone else if you’ve read the greatest salesman in the world it’s also in there it’s set across the board, like your failures are your greatest keys to success they lead.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: back so I agree 100% I.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I tell everyone I said listen, even if you fall flat on your face i’m 510 by fall flat on my face i’m still six feet further than I was a minute ago.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: yeah and every walk away every journey, what are you going to walk a mile 10 miles or 10,000 miles, whatever your journey as every journey starts with taking the first step, and you don’t take the first step.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: you’re just stuck and then like you’re the girl like she’s stuck and how long does somebody want to be stuck I try and fail, then like worked my whole life for somebody else’s dream and somebody else’s something when I have all my own dreams and goals.

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Steve Werner: Well she’s stuck by the golden handcuffs right like I mean it’s I mean no kids no husband know like she doesn’t have any financial worries.

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Steve Werner: And she’s just like, but if I don’t make enough money by like dude you’re going to be miserable for the rest of your life is it worth that.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: it’s time you know.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Something funny stable in my husband I split up now i’m from Ohio and I have moved all by myself to Fort lauderdale so I moved when I was 19 I for high school, we had that big blizzard of 78 is all before your time but Google.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: was born wizard biggest blizzard ever I wrecked my car that year I fell in the sound like three times I cracked my head and I was like when this Epping stuff melts i’m moving to Florida, and I did, and my family, you can just move to Florida that’s.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Not working anymore i’m moving so now it’s a decade later, you know American kids so my dad God bless him still on Ohio still in the same House he’s like well you know honey.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Why don’t you bring that babe and come back you can live live in your old bedroom which still to this day has the green shag carpet.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: On the 17th his you won’t have to pay any bills and you can just come back and you know kind of regroup so my mind is thinking okay touch my tongue go back to my dads and live on my old bedroom.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I think I rather swim into the ocean like prayers shark eats me like.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: that’s how that’s how how much going back to my dad’s was like really honestly I just rather a shark just eat me i’m just done and that’s it and I can’t even bear the thought.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: of going back and I appreciate they’re trying to help me, but I also knew if I took that step backwards, I would get stuck there.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Right and I was like I already left and i’m not about to go back and be stuck i’m sorry not brand new baby back to live under my daddy’s roof, I had 30 year old woman.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: So I had a lot of things, keeping me pushing me, I guess, keeping me from wanting to go back, I would rather just move forward and fail and get a job, then move back home or get some miserable.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Job waiting tables and nothing against you, if you wait tables God bless you for it, but I didn’t want to be doing that my whole adult life and not do anything else.

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Steve Werner: So I mean I.

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Steve Werner: I agree, I, like, I think that drives all of us right like.

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Steve Werner: entrepreneurs who are successful, we look at it and we say, well, these are the options, and I would rather die than live that kind of life or be miserable or leave live in mediocrity.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Exactly and I love my parents, but you know when I graduated high school and 77 so as, especially in small town, I was like until we had like cows pigs chickens a garden.

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Steve Werner: What town.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: West melton Ohio West not Ohio yay go bulldogs, so in that little town and small town mind was.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: When you get out of high school go get a factory job because General Motors was huge and i’ll in a factory job and get married and have kids and work for the man retire when you’re 60 so that is what my parents had said to me, all my life.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And my first job out of high school actually got a factory job.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: at all.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: It was called pick one engineering and pick what Ohio.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Now I maintain i’m living on a farm i’m very naive i’m extremely naive I don’t even know what the factories life on the inside i’ve never been inside one I know nothing other than they make good money so i’m like okay i’m gonna go get a factory job.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: So I got hired academy that’s silk screens T shirts, so you have to like drag the thing the page on my end they they hired me as a silk screener.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: So now, every day, I am covered head to toe i’m in paint i’m filthy dirty it’s June I just graduated high school I find out there’s no air conditioning, you have to stand all day is concrete floors.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: i’m dripping sweat i’m covered in paint i’m filthy dirty I remember thinking like why, when my parents who claim to love me want me to do this for 40 years.

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Steve Werner: Did they work there.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: They were factory people.

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Steve Werner: Not that I didn’t know any better.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: They have our factory people, so they did better than their parents who were like.

231
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: farmer them very poor from Tennessee.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: They were like the working for the man people and I just remember thinking like oh my God.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I don’t even know how this is gonna work for me so i’m only there for about a month and there’s this manager, so I was walking through isn’t always papers in his hand and their paint.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And all of a sudden, like the whole factory goes silent sound like to my neighbors what’s what’s happening.

235
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Oh, my God there’s a pink slips i’m like what does that mean things are going to lay people off like what does that mean means they’re going to load a bunch of people are gonna lay them off from work and they’re gonna send them home today, so now i’m just like.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Jesus, please, please, please let me get a pink slip because I can’t quit because i’m not raised like that, so I am literally praying praying.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And they’re getting down was just a few lots of my old, please, please, please, please, please let me get a pink slip I can just go home and said dad latte they laid everybody up.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And, but you know, the thing is, I was really young I was only me and I had a woman that weren’t next to me who got one.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: She was about 40 and she was bawling and she was crying and she was so devastated, so I said to her why on god’s Earth is up on happy about this look at this whole are working in your free.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Like go but she’s like, but my kids i’m a single mom and I don’t understand something I was you know, probably not the best thing to say, but I was so happy I got one.

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Steve Werner: I got one.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Oh, my God, I did I was like listen listen.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Your trainer that we have but you’re the newest persons, we had to let you go and I was like.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Thank you.

245
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Thank you, I have the guy was like oh my God, thank you.

246
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I just ran out of that place and I was like and I will call people back, as do not call me back i’m not coming back so.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: You got a spot.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: give it to that bar right here that’s crying and i’m not coming back dude I am so happy right now I was so happy see I don’t like the happiest day of my life.

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So.

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Steve Werner: I know this about me um I grew up in La I grew up in philly but then my parents split and my mom lived in arcadia Ohio is right next door I also right, so I waited tables in high school.

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Steve Werner: For some reason I I went to college I dropped out of college I got a factory job because it was like Oh, they make $35 an hour.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I like I.

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Steve Werner: Read days.

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Steve Werner: I was like.

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Steve Werner: I was like this is, I literally like I won I was out, I was doing to X, the production of everybody else on my line because i’m like, how can I do this faster and they’re like go slower you’re making us look bad.

256
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: he’s happy.

257
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: and healthy and slower i’m like.

258
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: This is.

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Steve Werner: So I was like screw this this is dumb this is stupid I left, but the what I want to touch on is, what do you think whether it’s real estate running a business like you’ve seen enough and you’ve you’ve got enough experience like looking back.

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Steve Werner: What is the one thing that if somebody is like I don’t want a factory job I don’t want to work in a restaurant I don’t want to do that, what is the one mental step.

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Steve Werner: that they can take that will get them to be successful, whether it’s real estate whether it’s a business, whatever it is like if you’re at one of your events and you’re.

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Steve Werner: walking through the crowd at people, what is the one thing if somebody is hungry, that you would tell them to do that, they like a daily habit a daily routine what is something that like gets the main here that will cause them to be successful.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: um yeah I give people, maybe so weird piece of advice, but when someone new comes up to me.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I tell them I say listen, let me, let me tell you something that’s going to happen when you decide, you want to be a real estate investor your family is going to say oh that’s a bunch of get rich quick.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: it’s not real it’s scamming that by this people are going to sell by don’t buy anything, and I said, if you, you can let the voices out of your head of the people who meanwhile by they make 15 bucks an hour i’m telling you not to do it.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: If you can get those voices out of your head and you can find a mentor somebody like me or somebody like you and you didn’t have that voice in your head encouraging you and telling you and and helping you, you can do anything.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: You have to get the voices the naysayers the family that really doesn’t mean well for you, but deep deep, deep down, you and I both know.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Your family and friends don’t want you to become a multi millionaire when they’re over here, making 50 grand a year because all of a sudden, you know that icon dawn change i’m like i’m exactly the same, I just have more money.

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Steve Werner: Well that’s people, we can we’re going to come back to money in just a second, but I want to the story that you just told about your parents, they they were giving you the best that they knew go work in a factory because that’s.

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Steve Werner: Why did my parents same way, my mom was a teacher my dad worked for the phone company, they did not when I set out on my own like I told them, I was gonna buy real estate when I came back from Italy.

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Steve Werner: And they were like.

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Steve Werner: My mom said you can’t be a landlord you’re in college, I went I took rich dad poor dad.

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Steve Werner: And some spreadsheets to my college professor, who I respected a lot, and he said his words verbatim were if it was that easy everybody would do it the next year I owned I bought 40 doors in my first year.

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Steve Werner: yeah he was like he came up to me in the cafeteria at college and was like.

275
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Steve Werner: Can we can we like, can you come over and show me how you did.

276
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: That because it’s.

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Steve Werner: It shouldn’t be possible like he didn’t.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: need me.

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Steve Werner: Like I was pretty quiet about it, but like word got around I bought an apartment building that housed college kids.

280
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Steve Werner: And I lived there and they were like how did that what happened and it’s the same I like get you cannot listen to the naysayers.

281
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: You need a voice in your head and it needs to not be your own because your own voice is like I can’t do it, what if what if what if we What if ourselves to death.

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Steve Werner: yep.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I cannot be the people around you because they’re gonna say I mean I remember when I told my I called my dad I said hey I met these people and i’m gonna i’m gonna fix up a house where you can do that you’re a single woman like you need a man, but.

284
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Steve Werner: Watch me.

285
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Okay, well, I don’t think so, but.

286
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: yeah i’m gonna try and i’ll see what happens I didn’t marry my husband now it’s on my daughter was 13 so in 13 years I started Ria.

287
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I wrote a best seller, I had like 20 Rentals at a custom boathouse and about I had a car, and all this stuff on myself, so now, I need my husband now listen dude.

288
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: we’re gonna talk, if you think i’m going to be like if you’re looking for a house lights like cook and clean and I do Andre.

289
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I am not your check if you want to have a live in to do all those things i’m totally down for that, because you know he’s a super rock star real estate guy to have a traditional and I was like.

290
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: i’m not that woman so that’s what you think that you want i’m telling you we pass right now, because.

291
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Steve Werner: i’m a first date go.

292
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Well, four days later, we made plans to get married.

293
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Steve Werner: How did he react to you saying what you just said, though.

294
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Well, he was a real estate investor and he had already done 100 deals, so I understand, like you, and I know when you meet a person that has an 800 deals, you know really what it took to do that.

295
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: So, you know that that person has confidence they’ve got god’s they’ve got a risk factor like you know those things.

296
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: They can do when someone says like oh yeah my my 50 on like.

297
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Oh so cute young if the deal that’s so cute oh yeah the hundred just like okay.

298
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: But his first wife, which is very traditional they have like horses and she was cooking cleaning the you know, and I just like that’s just not me so.

299
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I just felt that I felt like I just I am a full on business woman and I really love it.

300
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: i’m thriving and i’m doing well on the millionaire i’m raising my daughter, and like killing life, right now, so I just need to make sure you fully understand that.

301
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Any of those domestic things even grocery shopping, not on my list of things to do, if I have two hours free i’m not going to grocery shop i’m gonna go.

302
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Look at a deal or ride my bike or go to the beach i’m gonna do something for me.

303
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And he loved it, he was like i’ve never met a woman, like you, before I said well there’s probably not a lot of us, but being married to me, is a.

304
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Whole nother thing like you really need to understand that we are partner, then we R equals and there is none of this man job woman job stuff in my life and that’s just how it’s got to be.

305
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Steve Werner: So I want to, I want to.

306
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Steve Werner: American.

307
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: relationship questions and we had first two years, but it has quite a bit.

308
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Steve Werner: Well that’s Okay, so this is.

309
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Like.

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Steve Werner: equals I, this is what I believe in this is this might be a this is going to be a fun conversation I think.

311
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Steve Werner: 100%.

312
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I do.

313
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Steve Werner: I do believe that men do some things better and women definitely do some things.

314
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: But absolutely agreed.

315
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Steve Werner: So, how did you maintain feminine and masculine energy, because at the end of the day, that’s what attracts us to each other right I want a woman that doesn’t mean she needs to be at home cooking cleaning raising kids.

316
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Steve Werner: But she needs to be feminine.

317
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Steve Werner: And like I love business.

318
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Steve Werner: I can’t see myself dating anyone that is not business minded.

319
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Steve Werner: But at the same time, the women that I have dated that our business my in there, so in their masculine energy that there’s no attraction.

320
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: So now, and I am I I I still get that because I I am that woman like you know i’m a girl I do my hair and my makeup I got you know I try to just kind of sexy and.

321
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: You know, for me, but you know just because I feel good about who I am and i’m i’m probably a little bit overly dominant once in a while with other people that I feel like.

322
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: With Cisco right now Scott so villain I butted heads a few times and over little bit mostly because of me on things like.

323
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: He had been married for a long time, his wife took off with their personal trainer gone various he’s got the kids he’s a single dad he’s Disneyland dad.

324
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: We go out to eat, we have candy we don’t have a bad time at Disneyland dad you know compensating well i’m really structured with my daughter oh my God, this is bedtime is it that that and here’s how it goes.

325
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: But i’m also not used to saying like hey i’m gonna go i’ll be back later I just walk out.

326
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And, and we didn’t have cell phones really kind of barely getting cell phones back then yeah, and so I was just sometimes take off and he calls like what are you doing i’m like i’m I went to the mall so you didn’t say anything like.

327
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: That, am I supposed to.

328
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Steve Werner: vacation.

329
00:41:17.580 –> 00:41:25.410
Dwan Bent-Twyford: Well, I have to let you know, like okay i’m gonna show I don’t have to communicate here we go, so I had a little bit of a hard time.

330
00:41:27.810 –> 00:41:30.180
Steve Werner: spirit, like you, like to do what you want to do.

331
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: yeah yeah and so sometimes he said well you can’t just like leave and i’ll anybody know where you’re at and i’m like well i’ve been doing that.

332
00:41:38.280 –> 00:41:42.870
Dwan Bent-Twyford: For a decade, why do I have to suddenly be accountable, why do you need to know why.

333
00:41:43.260 –> 00:41:53.430
Dwan Bent-Twyford: So, so it was more of just learning like and I go in he’s like yeah we’re in the mountains, a bear mountain lion I don’t want to walk them I could be killed by something somebody does need to know where you’re at.

334
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Steve Werner: I think the realization where that probably changed for you was wasn’t he was trying to control you at all it’s just.

335
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I protected me.

336
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Steve Werner: yeah he’s trying to protect you and he’s like it’s just nice to know where people you would want to know where your daughter is you would want to know where like it’s a care thing not a control thing yes.

337
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And I am a woman, that I I like being a woman, I like being feminine I like having my doors held I, like my chair being pulled out, I, like my husband to order my food at a restaurant I like being a woman and I like being treated like a woman.

338
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: What I don’t like is trying to work with another man in something, and he thinks he’s superior This is like listen dude I am as smart, as you are.

339
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: mentally.

340
00:42:40.770 –> 00:42:47.940
Dwan Bent-Twyford: and physically, maybe, so I mentally say smart and I were were the same I might be smarter than you in fact and so.

341
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Steve Werner: So that’s, I think, women have you definitely have the capacity to deal with more like you guys can deal with 50 things going on guys are like we have a box right.

342
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Steve Werner: We have three boxes in our head and we are working to solve one box, at a time, women can deal with at things at once to know everything that’s going on and.

343
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: They do.

344
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Steve Werner: Like men to your point physically stronger.

345
00:43:12.060 –> 00:43:17.640
Steve Werner: We can fix things pretty well like we know how we innately know like kind of engineering stuff.

346
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: To do and I love that about men but that’s why we fix things.

347
00:43:21.690 –> 00:43:27.210
Dwan Bent-Twyford: I am that girl, that I am nothing against guys if you’re one of these guys I am that girl that.

348
00:43:27.570 –> 00:43:43.470
Dwan Bent-Twyford: I need a man that knows how to fix stuff and that’s probably because my dad knew how to fix things I want to guys like I don’t even know I don’t own a screwdriver i’m like seriously you’re on a screwdriver like you don’t have tools, how was that possible.

349
00:43:44.940 –> 00:43:47.190
Dwan Bent-Twyford: When I met bill I had more tools than he did.

350
00:43:50.160 –> 00:43:55.410
Dwan Bent-Twyford: Oh, my gosh it’s like oh my God, this is like my dream God dude I don’t ever told the world i’ve got everything.

351
00:43:55.740 –> 00:44:07.110
Steve Werner: Well, you you knew how to do this stuff that I want to point this out to anyone listening that’s like that’s not sexy or whatever, she owned all the tools, she knew how to do all the stuff that’s still doesn’t mean that you don’t like to have somebody do it for you.

352
00:44:07.290 –> 00:44:07.860
Steve Werner: I know how to.

353
00:44:07.950 –> 00:44:14.970
Steve Werner: cook but I love, a woman that can cook because it’s nice to have somebody do something for you it’s not a sexist thing at all.

354
00:44:15.090 –> 00:44:18.750
Steve Werner: I like it all day because I like fixing things.

355
00:44:18.930 –> 00:44:22.980
Steve Werner: Like to me, to get out of drill and a hammer and a screwdriver and build some stuff and like.

356
00:44:23.310 –> 00:44:31.530
Dwan Bent-Twyford: Exactly me too well that’s it, you know, like what’s a love language right a love language acts of service.

357
00:44:31.590 –> 00:44:35.880
Steve Werner: doing things for other people, because they enjoy it and there’s nothing wrong with that.

358
00:44:36.120 –> 00:44:46.170
Steve Werner: Just because, like and if you don’t like to cook that doesn’t mean that you have to cook for your your guy if you’re a girl like you find something that you can do that they appreciate, like everyone loves to be appreciated that’s all.

359
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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And you know I see honestly men, I read recently about that the number one thing with men like when men talk to other men is they feel underappreciated.

360
00:44:56.490 –> 00:45:09.210
Dwan Bent-Twyford: because so many women today just expect a man to do like these things and I make sure every day I tell my husband, every day, I appreciate him I love him I do things for him, because his love language is acts of service, but so is mine.

361
00:45:09.870 –> 00:45:20.070
Dwan Bent-Twyford: So he has to people and he’s always doing things for me, sometimes I forget to do things that’s my fault with all the spray say so great, all this love language, and I have to remember oh wait that’s his too.

362
00:45:20.610 –> 00:45:30.750
Dwan Bent-Twyford: So I have to consciously make myself aware like you know what he’s worked all day good massages to wrap his hands and make them a meal and they are making a dragon but he’s just like oh honey I love you so much.

363
00:45:31.020 –> 00:45:36.030
Dwan Bent-Twyford: Medicine, maybe loss of a woman or anything I like to take care of them, because I love him.

364
00:45:36.360 –> 00:45:41.310
Steve Werner: Well that’s at the end of the day, that’s I feel like a lot of the the sexism talk, that is.

365
00:45:42.180 –> 00:45:51.360
Steve Werner: in vogue right now, people are missing that it’s about appreciating the other person and making them feel cared and love and if somebody’s like why I shouldn’t have to cook to do that.

366
00:45:51.660 –> 00:46:01.830
Steve Werner: cool then find something else that you can do not about you, being in the kitchen or about you doing anything it’s just about caring about the other person.

367
00:46:02.100 –> 00:46:03.390
Steve Werner: And not saying me me me.

368
00:46:03.720 –> 00:46:08.400
Dwan Bent-Twyford: and women, right now, and I love women that women are to hell bent on.

369
00:46:10.080 –> 00:46:17.280
Dwan Bent-Twyford: feminists i’m like, but why what’s wrong with wanting a man run you a bad like what’s wrong with that.

370
00:46:17.400 –> 00:46:20.370
Dwan Bent-Twyford: Well, I think what they must have been rubbing you back.

371
00:46:20.580 –> 00:46:20.910
Steve Werner: I think.

372
00:46:21.480 –> 00:46:23.220
Steve Werner: That there’s nothing wrong with that, I think.

373
00:46:23.790 –> 00:46:38.700
Steve Werner: Is is that you can be you can be a you are proof of this, you can be a powerful woman and be an equal to a man and just be like when you’re equal they can still do stuff for you and you.

374
00:46:38.940 –> 00:46:40.170
Steve Werner: will do stuff for.

375
00:46:40.230 –> 00:46:50.580
Steve Werner: yeah it’s out of insecurity that they nope I can’t you can’t do anything for me, I must do everything for myself and I am it’s not about better it’s about equal.

376
00:46:50.820 –> 00:46:53.580
Steve Werner: Equal equal still have different strengths.

377
00:46:53.670 –> 00:47:03.000
Dwan Bent-Twyford: They do, and that is social gets done, I have very different string there’s a lot of things i’m better at than he is things he’s better at, and not even just physical things just things like, for example.

378
00:47:03.390 –> 00:47:13.980
Dwan Bent-Twyford: My husband has a math mind like i’ve never seen i’m over here like with a calculator okay to the what what was I doing like this is me, you know, and it was just like.

379
00:47:14.340 –> 00:47:29.640
Dwan Bent-Twyford: Okay here’s what I did and i’m just like I appreciate that so much, but then like talking like this and interviewing he’s not good at it he’s good talking to me but he’s one of those guys that like doesn’t like the a soft side.

380
00:47:30.990 –> 00:47:38.910
Dwan Bent-Twyford: But I see it, you know I I know it’s there, so we have you know just like different things in different ways of disciplining our kids and different ways of doing a lot of things.

381
00:47:39.180 –> 00:47:51.450
Dwan Bent-Twyford: And I always felt like we take our strengths and put them together because ideally like your strength is that person’s weakness and your weaknesses they’re still you know and that’s why two people will come on.

382
00:47:51.960 –> 00:47:55.650
Dwan Bent-Twyford: yeah ran together you’re not competing on the same team.

383
00:47:56.160 –> 00:48:01.470
Dwan Bent-Twyford: That i’m on team dwan are flying team bill we’re team or the team.

384
00:48:01.740 –> 00:48:14.580
Steve Werner: Well that’s they’ll relationships are all about becoming a team, like the anyone who says like they’re going to get married and they’re going to have to separate career paths it’s like it’s supposed to be a team it’s.

385
00:48:14.850 –> 00:48:15.570
Steve Werner: My partner.

386
00:48:15.690 –> 00:48:19.920
Steve Werner: we’re playing on the same team, so I have a I have one question.

387
00:48:21.150 –> 00:48:22.950
Steve Werner: That i’m and then we were going to wrap this.

388
00:48:22.950 –> 00:48:24.720
Dwan Bent-Twyford: up, how do you.

389
00:48:25.260 –> 00:48:33.750
Steve Werner: As a successful, this is something that has come up inside entrepreneur circles behind closed doors, and I would love your take on it did you guys have a prenup.

390
00:48:35.040 –> 00:48:36.300
Dwan Bent-Twyford: Now, and.

391
00:48:37.140 –> 00:48:49.200
Steve Werner: How did you get navigate that because that’s something like that something in my head anytime i’m dating somebody and it’s it has come up because it’s like, how do you I would love your take.

392
00:48:49.860 –> 00:48:50.370
well.

393
00:48:51.930 –> 00:48:52.980
Dwan Bent-Twyford: we’ve all had a lot.

394
00:48:53.520 –> 00:49:07.320
Dwan Bent-Twyford: yeah about that about the same we’re kind of on the same path and we knew that going forward that we would sort of joined forces and take what we had from here to like the stratosphere.

395
00:49:08.340 –> 00:49:18.480
Dwan Bent-Twyford: And so, also so i’m just want to preface this and i’m a Christian, so I was bill, and so, when I married bell I had been on a not dating.

396
00:49:20.820 –> 00:49:28.230
Dwan Bent-Twyford: So it’s hard to explain, but I had gone to like a singles retreat and made a commitment to God not today, not to have sex, not to.

397
00:49:28.500 –> 00:49:34.920
Dwan Bent-Twyford: Just like kind of just reverse and eyes and live by the Bible and pray for God to bring me a husband, that would be like the husband.

398
00:49:35.280 –> 00:49:48.450
Dwan Bent-Twyford: and not let anything get in the way of it, besides, knowing that he was the guy and he was on a similar path and so when we met I knew and he knew that we really would be the people.

399
00:49:49.110 –> 00:50:09.420
Dwan Bent-Twyford: That last all of the days, so we dated we did not have sex with Bible studies we did the whole thing the way you’re supposed to do it out of the gates this time around, so I just knew I guess that my marriage would be blessed and I knew he knew that and we are both very fair.

400
00:50:10.530 –> 00:50:16.830
Dwan Bent-Twyford: And we both kind of came in, with the same both with money and spoke with success and there hey listen to things for whatever.

401
00:50:17.730 –> 00:50:24.600
Dwan Bent-Twyford: And we have to part ways will just be fair about whatever we need to be able to do, but we also are the mindset that divorces on option.

402
00:50:25.020 –> 00:50:32.970
Dwan Bent-Twyford: Like in 20 years of marriage, we have never threaten to divorce each other we’ve never left the House and stay someplace else we work it out.

403
00:50:33.420 –> 00:50:41.850
Dwan Bent-Twyford: And we pray about it and we keep God in the Center of our marriage and I know that doesn’t apply to a whole lot of people, and I was like well Okay, what about a prenup um so.

404
00:50:42.600 –> 00:50:48.690
Dwan Bent-Twyford: If you’re if you’re planning your divorce, I feel like it’s always in the back of your head.

405
00:50:49.050 –> 00:51:02.220
Dwan Bent-Twyford: That there’s an option and I get i’ve been married twice before so clearly I didn’t get it right either the first two times, but this was the first time I approached marriage in the right way, I was looking for a partner.

406
00:51:03.180 –> 00:51:18.390
Dwan Bent-Twyford: Equal building what we have into we’re here and we’re going to go over to the moon and back into the universe, and we are the people that you can say honestly and 100 years from now, we will be married still.

407
00:51:19.800 –> 00:51:29.190
Dwan Bent-Twyford: Here married because we make the effort and the time and put it in, and if a man or a woman, because my friends were telling me and my family told me to get a prenup.

408
00:51:30.180 –> 00:51:36.840
Dwan Bent-Twyford: And I was like but i’m not going to what you’ve been married twice before I don’t like getting divorced looks like because they are different this time I took a decade.

409
00:51:37.560 –> 00:51:50.010
Dwan Bent-Twyford: off, I mean I didn’t date I took time off well, I was a little bit of a man hater in the beginning, to be honest, you know, because my Divorce is pretty nasty but I took the time to do it right and I felt like I that I was doing it right so.

410
00:51:51.180 –> 00:52:02.820
Dwan Bent-Twyford: For me personally, if someone asked me to sign a prenup i’d be so offended that they would think that I would need, and I think that they have to start over at any age, I would be so offended I feel like it would be a deal breaker for me.

411
00:52:03.540 –> 00:52:06.600
Steve Werner: Well that’s I think that’s a good answer, I think the other, I mean.

412
00:52:06.630 –> 00:52:08.940
Dwan Bent-Twyford: had a long answer, but that’s what how I got there.

413
00:52:09.120 –> 00:52:11.400
Steve Werner: It is a great answer, I think the key I mean.

414
00:52:12.930 –> 00:52:20.640
Steve Werner: For me, I don’t divorce, would not be an option, like you say till death do us part like that’s that’s the word right like.

415
00:52:20.850 –> 00:52:24.900
Steve Werner: I think if you approach it like that there’s a really interesting book, I read that was on.

416
00:52:25.800 –> 00:52:36.870
Steve Werner: Pre arranged marriages and not trying to be any kind of weird political thing, but they said what came out of it was the people approached it as I don’t have a choice, this is who i’m marrying and.

417
00:52:37.410 –> 00:52:48.480
Steve Werner: we’re going to make it work, yes, usually what happened is over five like five to eight years they fell into a deep like respectful love for each other.

418
00:52:48.510 –> 00:52:49.830
Dwan Bent-Twyford: hey do i’ve read that.

419
00:52:50.040 –> 00:52:57.150
Steve Werner: Where it’s about partnership and we are a team, how do we get, how do we build the best team possible.

420
00:52:57.180 –> 00:52:58.200
Dwan Bent-Twyford: And when you approach it like.

421
00:52:58.200 –> 00:52:58.710
That.

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Steve Werner: Like marriage changes, but I feel like unfortunately part of what’s preached in today’s society is.

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Steve Werner: You know it’s all about being an individual and if you’re not getting what you want, out of it, then you know you just quit and find something else, and that that is a really bad way to approach.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: It away, and you know, and I mean I got married in my 20s the first time I was on we’re in three months, so it was like.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: It was sort of a cocaine and do stupid.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: But I really thought you know, but really looking back.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I was at that point when I went in one to have a baby, and you know, on this idea.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: But by time I met don was mature enough, I really understood that it is a teamwork, it is a partnership and there’s not an option there’s no way out, it is, but I do I teach my lesson I listen you’re my third husband.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I am never getting divorces and i’ll be that crazy woman, I like she just gets divorced all the time, so should we don’t get along i’m going to call them that depth, it was claws.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And dig a big hole with the backhoe out here on my 10 acres and put your dead body in it, because if we part we’re going to go by death do us part enough, I had to take you out first.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Then he’s like hey Am I hey I didn’t have to run a backhoe dude so do not mess with me doors is not an option i’m calling him the Jeff boss if we can’t get along and I tell people that like seriously i’m like.

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Steve Werner: Come on.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: No Probably not.

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Steve Werner: All right, so anybody listening that.

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joy.

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Steve Werner: yeah you are I know you’re.

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Steve Werner: Listening that has enjoyed this conversation, this has been a far ranging conversation all around entrepreneurship commitment next.

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Steve Werner: You have a lot of books, but the two that I want to highlight.

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Steve Werner: You have two books that are free, on your website what’s your website.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Do wonderful.com so just be w and D or F ul.com.

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Steve Werner: Success so nomics the first book, which is probably I would guess a recap, of a lot of things we’ve talked about here.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Steve forbes.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I felt like that was the highest oh my God i’m going to talk with Steve forbes holy cow, this is that.

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Steve Werner: it’s free.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Yes, it’s free.

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Steve Werner: Go get the book guys like if you enjoyed this conversation, if you think that you can learn something I guarantee that you can go get the book it’s free tell us a little bit about events and real estate training if people are like I want to do that.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Where can I.

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Steve Werner: Where can they learn some real estate chops from you.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Well, on my site if they opt in you know they get the free box, I do, I actually still do a live webinar every Monday I call it motivational Monday and I have my podcast most wonderful real estate podcast ever but I, it is very much.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I have a heart for helping people.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Get I guess to be free, I think this this is to be free doesn’t mean money doesn’t solve all your problems yeah I mean if you have problems you’re in if you’re a jerk you’re just going to be a richer, I mean it doesn’t really.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: solve your problems, but having money does not necessarily make anything anymore that’s for sure, so I feel like for me I just, I feel, just so compelled to help people get out of that.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Man working for the man being stuck on the job doing all the stuff like that, so I just want to help people to be free.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: So I do webinars we do live workshops, of course, you know they’re a little bit on hold, right now, because coven.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: But i’m still really about working with people face to face and meeting people and helping them.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: And if they want to just do a few deals a year, or they want to pay for their kids education or or they’re my age are like holy cow I can’t retire what the hell or they’re just like you know what I just want more for myself, I just really want to help people just to be free.

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Steve Werner: I mean, that is, that is a great mission, I think, freedom is the number one driver for most entrepreneurs, I know, like we did had to like do my like my levels of like what drives me and freedom was definitely the number one.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: So far, I always tell people listen so that old saying that the grass is greener, the side so i’m telling you it is greener, on this side of the fence i’m I promise you it’s greener.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: It may cost more to do the South and have someone to mow it but it’s definitely green or from that broke single mom to over here, it is for sure green on the side of the fence so don’t let people say I was a graduate of doing this side because it is it actually is.

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Steve Werner: awesome well dwan I want to say thank you so much for coming on you were amazing guests.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: yeah I have to tell you this was the most fun interview I think i’ve ever done no one’s ever talked to me about like bill and women and men equal and this is so, this is like by far my most favorite i’ve ever had Thank you so much like so much.

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Steve Werner: No problem is my pleasure, I love doing these and you never know I think anyone out there that comes to an interview with like a preset like it has to be this you’re missing out like you shared so much stuff that is inspiring to people, and I think it’s.

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Steve Werner: It makes people tick.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: I tried to inspire 62 years I have a little more wisdom that I had back in the day doesn’t mean I know everything I still do dumb stuff, but I just do less than.

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Steve Werner: it’s all right it’s all learning right.

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Dwan Bent-Twyford: Like oh my God what was I thinking so.

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Steve Werner: awesome well to anyone listening, make sure you go check out i’m in a mess up saying it dawn dawn careful, I have to like.

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Steve Werner: Go check out her website, make sure you grab the book listen to this podcast a couple more times check out her podcast webinar like she’s at places go check one of them out guarantee it will be fun and until next time take action change lives and make money we’ll see you soon.

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Steve Werner: Okay we’re good.